my father, drunk, talking to me in bed
dying bastard plays piano
the curtains blindsided
a weak yellow haze
sugary sweet outside brown rustle,
balm to my soul
inhale:
the heat curled around me
like a child indesperation on a hot July night
talking was simple,
when maa wasn’t there
exhale:
I breathe through heaped lungs
your bloodshot eyes
slurring as dawn ignites on
the eastern skies
caramel lights of day-break
still stuck to my soul
brings ants of demons / I want nothing.
crawls and bites
inhale:
I brace for impact
like I have done a thousand times
before
the blow never came
physically, the silent tension
I sat and let the
words flow of your slurred speech
I want to break free.
exhale:
your words like
blood
nurture my tree to grow, too fast
too abrupt
dreams of being a professor
from mother to son to son
seventy years
the crack is where the light enters
verisimilitude
the broken shards of vodka glass
like your promises, on the floor
they are not mine.
To give.
Do not accept it.
I cry as I watch the great
Surrounds
a monster’s broken dreams // mirrors to bring
to see myself as such.
Liar.
my birdsong still plays the same
devotion always came so easy to you
